The Peace Happiness and Love Blog

Let the goofing begin!

OK, so I haven’t exactly written much this week.

Let me rephrase:  I haven’t written anything this week.

And I’ve had so much fun — so much peace happiness and love has come into my life!

This week, with my “elephant-sized challenge” thing, I’ve connected with five super-fantastic people all of whom are doing things they love. They have ideas that are amazing. We talked and I tried to help them get a little un-stuck and a little more connected to other equally un-stuck people.

It turns out my “right people” are coming from all over the globe, from all walks of life (for example, one is a super-smart techie and one is a super-smart farmer!), and they all share qualities like really loving what they do and truly caring for others. We’ve had more fun than a barrel of monkeys, and I speak from experience because I actually own two barrels of monkeys and they’re not even close to this in the fun department.

And next week I have more of these free consults scheduled. So if you’d like to talk tand possibly get un-stuck, or figure out how to make the icky less icky, sign up for a spot. It’ll be cool and we can connect about whatever your thing is.

No slackermoms here…

In a surprise development, I actually had a chance to have a real-life playdate with my friend Jessica, aka “slackermomspeaks“.

And you know what? She’s not a slackermom in any way. She’s awesome and warm and has a beautiful daughter who likes climbing trees just like my kids do. How lucky I am to have found her and have a moment in the sun together.

But there are phenomenoodles…

One of my favorite new discoveries (through twitter, I might add) of the week is @magswallis whose fantastic website and blog phenomenoodle makes me want to giggle every time I think of it. The info she has there is so good — all about helping you know how to become visible online and caring that visibility might be scary. Totally my kind of thing.

And she has a facebook fan page, which Effie loves. And I also love having another fun person to goof around with on twitter… so you should come goof around with both of us…

So without further adoo, let the goofing begin! Have a lovely weekend, and all my best,

-liz

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Send a Friend Sunday #2

Effie (“The Elephant Manifesto”) woke me up bright an early this morning with the idea that we need to send a huge, elephant-sized THANK YOU to those who have joined the Effie the Elephant fan club on Facebook. As of this morning we have 18 wonderful, amazing members. That’s awesome.

Effie’s getting ready to write again…

Partly because it seems time to add to the manifesto, and partly because summer is almost over and Effie will no longer be required to play with our kids during the day once they go back to school, we’re starting to get set for the next phase.

Now we just have to figure out what that is.

So this is really important:  We need your input.

We want to start by to collecting your stories about elephant embracing.

I’m going to read all of these to Effie, and then we’ll decide how to proceed.

Perhaps we will find an underlying need that several stories have in common. Maybe the stories can be used to help others (with permission, of course). Maybe they’ll lead to something we haven’t even thought of yet… which would be really, really cool.

So, if you’d like to send a story about your own elephants or elephant embracing or anything relating to Effie’s inspiration, send your email to liz@lizmcgowen.com and I’ll make sure it is shared with Effie. We will, of course, never ever breathe a word about it to anyone else without your permission and we will, of course, write you back as soon as we’ve had a chance to read it.

Got it? We can hardly wait to hear from you!

… and Effie is gonna be super-bored after the kids go back to school on 8/31, and a bored elephant is not something I want to deal with around here.

Oh, yeah, and the elephant-sized giveaway…

I almost forgot to mention, over the next 45 days I’ve set aside time to offer 100 different people a free consultation. If I don’t meet the goal of 100, that’s totally cool with me, but I want to let you and people you care about know it’s out there and available.

If you’d like a free consultation, go to the “Elephant Sized Givaway” spot on the right-hand side of the screen and sign up. There are no strings or expectations on my part, and I’m not gonna try to sell you on anything.

It’s just an opportunity to connect with my right people in a very meaningful way and help each and every one of my readers, friends, colleagues, and everybody. It would be my pleasure to have a chat with you and get to know you better.

All my best…

-liz

PS:  It’s really important to me that Effie’s words get out there to as many people as possible. So, if you know anyone who’s been struggling, I’d love it if you’d take a moment to send that person the link to the manifesto: http://www.lizmcgowen.com/the-elephant-manifesto/

Or, if it’s easier for you and those you care about,  join the “Effie the Elephant Fan Club on Facebook” and come hang out with fellow elephant embracers there!

Helping 100 People in 45 Days

Over the last weeks I’ve realized that I’ve been amazingly fortunate since starting my business. There have been so many people who have been mentors, advisors, or just “whisperers” giving me wonderful help and advice.

So, it’s time to give back. I’ve decided that in the next 45 days, between now and October 1, I’m going to give a free, one-hour consultation session to 100 different people.

That’s right. It’s gonna be super fun, crazy busy, and we’re gonna make things happen.

I’m kicking it off tomorrow (so I’m actually cheating and giving myself one extra day).

So if that sounds like fun to you — as a way to get work with your peoplerelationships stuff, or on how to deal with difficult people, or to get un-stuck, or to develop a strategy, or to work even for a little bit on something that’s really, really difficult for you to do alone — then all you have to do is join my mailing list. I will send you the link to my online appointment system, and you can pick the time that works for you.

Simple. Easy Peasy. No strings. Let’s talk and get your stuff moving!

And if you want to stand on the sidelines and cheer, that’s cool, too. I’m planning to update you on the numbers and how things are going, so you can glimpse my next 45 days in action. Crazy, but that’s what I’m doing.

A couple of details:

• All non-Chicago (Illinois, USA) clients will need to provide me with their Skype contact info. I can’t afford to offer a free session and then pay for a call halfway across the world. Hope that makes sense.
• All times for appointments are Chicago time, Central Standard Time. Hope that helps.
• I’m squeezing this in between my regular “stuff”, seeing clients who actually pay me, but I’ve opened up a lot of my schedule to do this since it’s a priority. Hope you can find a time that works for you.
• If you need to reschedule for any reason, I ask that you do so at least 24 hours in advance if you can… that helps me keep things straight and keeps me from being grumpy.
• Nothing is too anything for this project. Whatever you want to talk about is cool, that’s your choice. I’ll do my very-absolutely-superdy-duperdy best to help you.

Sound fun? Send an email to coachwithliz@aweber.com, and join my email list. Or go to the right-hand column on the screen and sign up there. Once you confirm your subscription, I’ll automatically send you to the site where you can pick the day and time you want to talk.

This is going to be so much fun. I can hardly wait!

-liz

The first ever “Send A Friend” Sunday

OK, so as you know, Effie came up with “The Elephant Manifesto”, and I typed it. It has traveled around the world and back again, bringing us beautiful words and love from many people. People have written to share their delight at Effie’s words, and these notes have brought me amazing joy.

So often these days, when I get together with a friend who has read the manifesto, our conversation will include something like, “I heard from my friend who is now a big Effie fan, and…”

For this I am grateful.

Effie has been able to help so many begin to embrace parts of themselves and their lives that are really, really scary — maybe, she’s even helped you. She’s been able to help people start caring for parts of themselves and begin to move forward toward happier places.

I think her words are super helpful. It’s really important to me that her words get out there to as many people as possible, to help as many people as possible.

So, if you know anyone who’s been struggling, I’d love it if you’d take a moment to send them the link to the manifesto:

http://www.lizmcgowen.com/the-elephant-manifesto/

Or, if it’s easier for you and those you care about, you can join the “Effie the Elephant Fan Club on Facebook” and invite people you care about to come hang out with us there.

All my best…

-liz

PS:  I want to thank the wonderful @havi of The Fluent Self for her input and ideas in this “send a friend Sundays” idea… you’re the best, Havi.

Pollyanna has a really bad day

Sometimes I can just feel the veil falling over me. It’s like thunder clouds rolling in. I can see them on the horizon. It’s just a matter of time.

For a long time — most of my life, in fact — I felt I should get a running start before this happened. I thought I could put on some rose colored glasses and get really busy, and avoid the veil of the storm falling over me. For years I did that.

If I worked and worked and worked, the veil wouldn’t catch up. The storm wouldn’t hit. There was no time for it to happen.

But eventually the rose colored glasses got too scratched and I just wasn’t able to move fast enough anymore.

Nowadays, it catches up with me fast and, even if only for a moment, I’m completely consumed in the storm.

Sometimes the veil stays all day. Sometimes it’s for longer. Sometimes Effie is able to help, but other times she’s learned it’s just something I need to deal with and work through.

It’s so hard when this happens. Especially when you know you must get to the next thing… the event… the client… the appointment. Or when there is something really, really hard you have to take care of and it just needs to happen.

And if the storm moves in and stays for long periods (fortunately, mine are mostly short-lived), it’s always a good idea to get help.

It’s hard.

I share this not because I’m incredibly crazy (which I might be), but to let you know that many people experience this. Even if you’re the most successful person in the world, you’re still not immune from the veil falling over you. The storm chases so man of us.

No matter how many pairs of glasses you get, or how fast you try to run, it happens.

The difference, perhaps, is what you do once it happens. Do you weather the storm, or do you put on your glasses and try to avoid the storm by running and running. And running.

The question becomes, how long can you keep running.

The answer becomes, what help can you find.

I struggle with this. And my clients struggle with this. In that sense, we’re weathering the storm together. It’s nice to have people willing to stick with you.

After years and years of running, it can be scary to slow down and let the veil come over you. Scarier still to figure out how to move out of it.

But you can do it. At least I believe you can. Because you are not alone.

Effie goes on Facebook

This morning, after multiple prods and pokes from friends, I finally got myself in gear and separated from my three kids for long enough to set up a Facebook fan club group for Effie The Elephant.

You remember Effie, right? The author of “The Elephant Manifesto“?

And then I promptly screwed the whole thing up and had to re-do it.  Twice.

Anyway, the new group is up.

I also have a super-cool new graphic done by the very famous and talented @sparkyfirepants, who does graphic designs for all kinds of cool things like e-book covers. If you have a need for this sort of thing he should be your #1 go-to-guy because he’s fabulous and super easy to work with.

Come check out the Effie’s Fan Club page. And feel free to bring your elephant along to say hi.

All my best,

-liz

Pollyanna has a steamy affair

Today’s post is going to be quick and dirty. I’m finally coming clean.

The object of my desire is consuming my every waking moment and I can no longer keep this secret from you, dear reader.

I’m in love with a grocery store.

I walk down the aisles, mesmerized by the sheer quantity of foods. Cookies from exotic lands. A whole wall of olive oils, some even with mysterious sediments at the bottom of the bottles. Produce that seems to go on forever.

Things I’ve never even known existed, now I want. I crave.

And it’s cheap, too, making my little Midwestern heart race with desire every time I run my fingers over a fresh family pack of hamburger. Affordable vice, you are mine.

Perhaps this is my mid-life crisis.

Sadly, in this cornucopia of fine food, I am unable to find Campbell’s soup. Oh well. Romance is never all it’s cracked up to be.

If you live near Chicago, this paradise of produce is in Niles, the Fresh Farms at Touhy near the Wal-Mart.

You should go. Be sure to say hi.

I’ll be the one with the three kids who are loudly arguing Dora vs. Danimals in the yoghurt aisle.

Even Pollyanna has difficult moments.

All my best,

-liz

Elephant Stampede!

OK, so by now you’ve noticed that I was away for a while. Let’s just say my own elephants came out and needed to be slowly and carefully talked off the cliff. Since I didn’t have Tina around to help mediate, it took a while.

But I’m back.

Here’s what happened:

Thanks to my amazing brother and his lovely bride, my girls and I spent nearly two weeks in Nebraska. I know, we’re trend-setters, vacationing in such a spot. We tickled chickens (and had a wonderful time with @victoriashmoria on twitter discussing the implications of chicken tickling). We connected with old friends. My kids even drove a tractor. We looked at corn and soybeans. It was awesome.

Then there was my patient husband, who stayed home with our senile but still goofy dog, cleaned out the basement and assembled a new TV cabinet. I think he also became good friends of the staff at the Whole Foods deli, too, but he isn’t talking about that side of the story.

And my wonderful clients waited for me, and stored up all the great details of their lives to share when I got back. I even got to re-connect with someone I worked with several months ago, who is now ready to move to the next step. How cool is that?

In between all this there was a birthday for a certain-special-now-10-year-old, juggling summer camps and multiple playdates, and even a few breakfast-ey opportunities to sneak away for a cup of coffee and a chat. And the most lovely, encouraging, what-I-most-needed-to-hear-at-the-moment letter from my friend Jessica (@slackermomspeak).

All these are treasures.

And now there’s something new:

I’ll call the new thing FOCUS. I know, it can be a scary word. It always seems to be something I tend to avoid.

But I’m really kind of diggin’ it.

Focus means not worrying about all the other stuff around me. Focus just means I do what I do (and having the courage to admit that I’m damned good at it!).

Focus means I get to reach out to more people and say: Here’s what I do. Being able to say: Here’s how I can help.

It means getting to connect with new people, which is cool.

As long as it’s not speed-networking. That is not cool.

Now there’s also something old:

Old is the new focus.

Hope that makes sense.

By old, I mean doing things the way I love them and the way they work for me, rather than doing things the way other people do them.

It’s connecting with people who need my help — sometimes with their elephants, sometimes with other things.

It’s talking with them where they are comfortable — rather than being that-lady-with-an-office-they-must-go-see. Sometimes it means being outside if it’s nice, at their home if that’s most comfortable, over the phone if they live far away.

It means giving the very few the very best, especially if it means being highly original.

I love original. Don’t you?

It means being a human extension cord who connects people with resources and contacts to help them stretch to their goals.

And now there’s proof that the old works:

On Monday I heard from someone who is one of my “right people”. She is wonderful — no, amazingly brilliant is a better description — at what she does. She had been put in an impossible situation last year and, like most impossible situations, it didn’t work out. By the end of the year she was miserable. She lost her job, and her confidence was shattered.

I’m like the baking soda of self confidence for my right people — I get right in there and mix everything up to make sure things start rising. So we started with the basics. Goals. Desires. Grieving. Contacts. Good old-fashioned networking. Coffee. Making sure face-to-face connections were happening.

On Monday, she called to say she got THE job. Not just any job, but a job that she is going to be spectacular at. I stood in my living room and bounced up and down while we cheered — and cried — together about this happy event.

Now this is a woman who has probably sent out hundreds of resumes in the past few months. She’s networked with everyone imaginable. She stayed strong (even though she cried many, many tears).

And she will now be making an obscene amount of money (far more than before) and be in a position of authority and have more fun than she could imagine.

Yes, there is a Santa Claus. And you’d better believe that he networks his ass off and has a really good support system.

Hope all is well with you. I missed you.

-liz

Highlights from Iowa

We’re in Nebraska, visiting my brother and his family for the holiday.

If you’ve ever driven from Chicago to Nebraska, you understand that it’s not perhaps the most exciting drive.

Having done it hundreds of times, however, I dearly love it because the road brings me home. It’s so good to drive and think for 500 miles.

Near Adair, Iowa, which is between Des Moines and Omaha, we found something really exciting that has developed just in the past couple of years — windfarms. Here’s a peek. Although this video is taken from a different area, it was the one that conveyed the experience: Iowa wind farm near arcadia, IA

These beautiful structures are so lovely to watch — like seeing beautiful sculptures or performance art. I wish there was some sort of “pull-over” where you could stop and watch (and find out more about what’s happening).

My oldest said it looks like someone doing cartwheels. My youngest asked if it was a circus. And middle girl was asleep.

Check out this video I found, although it’s hard to convey the experience of looking out and seeing the horizon moving and swaying in a kind of beautiful dance.

Enjoy. Talk to you soon.

Oh, yeah, and I’m required by Nebraska law (and by my family) to say this: Go Huskers.

Waiting for happiness

Yesterday was a glorious day.

This was despite the fact that the mighty Knights lost 9-8 in their softball championship, for those of you who are regular readers. There was some disappointment, but our team had a grand slam home run and other notable accomplishments, so it was a victory in our minds.

So there I was at the park yesterday with my girls. You should know that I am not a hover parent. Unless one of my kids is really, really stuck and in danger of falling, I usually keep myself parked on a bench and let them work things out for themselves. The little ones get pushes on the swings, but that’s about it.

At one point two beautiful girls came to the park with the grandmother, and both girls were full of energy and ready to go. They were tall enough to get onto the swings by themselves, which they did right away.

And then they did something very interesting.

They did nothing.

The two beautiful, capable little girls waited until their grandmother came over to push them. They didn’t even try to get started on their own. They didn’t cooperate and push each other.

It made me think of how many times in my own life I’ve been capable of doing something, but I held back. I waited for the push. I didn’t struggle and flail like mad to get going. I delayed that feeling of soaring and almost flying and instead stayed tethered to the ground.

Sometimes, it’s been because another person told me they were going to give me a push, and sometimes that kept me stuck in my tracks.

So my question for today is this:  Why are you waiting? Do you really need to wait for someone else to push you, or can you do it yourself?